JUST BECAUSE YOU FEEL IT DOESN’T MEAN IT’S THERE

Finished Gravitations 3 last night. It had another wordy short story at the end, but this one was actually kind of fun. It had a guy chasing after a young girl and insisting he wasn’t a Humbert Humbert--sort of like how none of the boys in the main story are gay when they kiss. Ironically, the author had a note about how the short story wasn’t very good. I guess we’ll have to agree to disagree.

*

I had a couple of great teachers in college. I hated my academic experience overall, but there were a handful of classes that really made a difference for me, and it was usually down to the teacher. In fact, I learned quickly if you found a good teacher, you should stick with him or her. Stephen Cooper and Charles Webb were two writing teachers who pushed me in the right ways; I forget the name of another who unwittingly did the same. You can take two semesters of novel writing, and he was teaching what was to be my second. Only he wasn’t going to allow me to continue the book I started (Cut My Hair) because it didn’t “interest” him. I went and sat down at my desk, stood back up, and walked out. My only regret is that I had taken the first week and had been forced to read not only The Firm, but a completely useless textbook on how to write a novel (tip: they're all useless).

Another great teacher was Dr. David Peck. He was particularly helpful in talking about 20th century American literature and the novel of initiation—which is kind of what I was working on. (He even wrote a book on the subject.) His colleague was Dr. Charles May. May’s specialty was the layered nature of fiction, how story exists on many planes at once and can be sliced up and peeled like an onion. (He also wrote a book, Fiction’s Many Worlds, that is excellent, but for some reason very expensive.)

He came back to me as I rewatched Adaptation this weekend. This movie that seems to confound so many (or cause them to declare it pretentious and boring) seems so natural and obvious to me, and I am guessing it’s all down to what I started picking up from Dr. May.

For me, the key to Adaptation is to approach the many possible layers, the worlds that exist simultaneously and parallel. We begin with (1) the real world Charlie Kaufman, who is a screenwriter hired to adapt (2) the fictional world of Susan Orlean’s book, which actually also could cause (1) to intersect with (3) the real world Orlean. Ultimately, what he hopes to create is (4) a motion picture version of (2). The difficulty of that task causes (4) to mutate and splinter, creating more layers: (4a) the fictional world of Charlie Kaufman, where he is writing (4b) his version of The Orchid Thief. Within that is (4c), what he imagines as the real world of Susan Orlean (something that might have stuff in common with (2) and (3), but not necessarily, just as (4a) is only a representation of (1)). Further, we get (4d) the life of Donald Kaufman, his brother, and (4e), the screenplay Donald relates to Charlie, The 3. Midway through the film, we also get (4f), which is where Donald takes over the screenplay (after Charlie sees Robert McKee and calls his brother to New York), taking it to his own conclusion, scooping up (4a), (4b), (4c) and his own (4d) along the way--and with the brothers singing “Happy Together,” even incorporating (4e). (In fact, aren’t Charlie, Donald, and Susan really a reflection of the multiple personality character Donald has created for The Three?). By the end, we have (5), the actual film Adaptation, a combination of all of those elements.

Not stopping there, we also have (6), the viewing public. This is the story we create just by trying to peel the onion, and to pierce the mythos crafted around the film—such as wondering whether Donald Kaufman is an actual person or not. I would argue that the discourse around the film, that the people loudly questioning the fabric of it in the theatre when I saw it, added another layer to the metafiction Kaufman and Spike Jonze created.

But, it’s important to remember, even in discussing (1), (3), or (6), that there is no reality, per se. In trying to decipher what did happen and what didn’t, keep in mind that what is actually on film is all story, all crafted by an author. It doesn’t matter what “really happened,” but what triggered each onion petal.

A lot of DVD collectors have avoided buying the Adaptation DVD out of the fear that there will be a better version later, featuring special features, not just the bare bones release we have now. I actually hope that doesn’t happen, unless what they present only serves to obscure the onion’s construction further. A serious commentary on this movie, at least if presented by the filmmakers, would destroy the experience. Adaptation shouldn’t be explained, only deciphered. And trust me, the second time around, it makes even more sense. Every screenwriting trick Donald and Charlie learn along the way sets up the final act, and so many of the other elements end up foreshadowing or reflecting others.

I have no idea if this will make sense to anyone but me, but I was mainly writing this to run through the gears in my own head anyway.

Current Soundtrack: Tricky, Vulnerable (currently being streamed at anti.com)

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HERE COMES THE MUSIC

NOTICE: Wearing backpacks to concerts is a bad, bad thing. If you’re that guy, the one who shows up to general admission shows with a backpack full of crap, I have news for you: there is nothing in your nerd bag of tricks you need! You wandering through the crowd bumping people because you have no clue how big that hunch on your back is just makes everyone hate you.

NOTICE #2: If you’re going to need more beer every second or third song, pick a place near the bar. Being on the opposite end of the club from the bar, and having to push your way back and forth every time you need to get your drink on will make everyone hate you.

NOTICE #3: If you can’t get there on time, stand in the back. If a band has been playing for an hour, chances are the audience has worked out a system where everyone is comfortable and can see. You haven’t earned the right to be as close as we have, and frankly, you should learn a little etiquette. No one likes going from having a perfect view to only being able to see the singer’s head. This is why everyone hates you.

These are the things I learned at the Ash concert last night. I also formulated a plan for world peace. I—and I alone—will be issued a billy club, and if you commit any infraction against what I think is right and proper, then I will club you. I will have to answer to a weekly committee and explain my actions, just so I don’t go around willy nilly clubbing people unchecked—but my power is absolute and fighting back only gets you in more trouble. I recommend buying stock in razor companies, because bad beards are going to get people clubbed left, right, and center, and I imagine many will be shaving after I take over.

The Space Twins opened for Ash. This is the side band for the guitarist from Weezer. It was decent stuff, but exactly what you’d imagine. Like Weezer without the melody. It was one of those bands where the players were so incredibly competent, that they were also incredibly bland. Their technical skill superceded any emotion or power. I hate to put it this way, but it’s generally the same sound you hear with any band formed by guys with money. It’s like a trust-fund kid band, where everyone has great equipment, knows how to use it, but has no charisma or anything to really say. Super Deluxe were a NW band in the mid-‘90s that very much typified that. Most recently, I’d say Phantom Planet is the shining example—Hollywood kids who make a passable Beach Boys meets the Byrds sound, but who ultimately bore.

Ash, however, delivered in a big, big way. It didn’t matter to them that they were playing a tiny club, they gave it everything they had. Tim Wheeler was all over the stage, and his guitar playing skills in particular impressed in comparison to Space Twins. He really knows how to play, but yet, the guy has such a magical knack for a tune, it’s astounding. They focused primarily on material off of 1977 and Free All Angels, deviating only for “A Life Less Ordinary” (yay! this was the one song I went in thinking if people shouted for requests, it’s what I’d shout for! (something you always should decide on before going in)), a surprising “Jack Names the Planets,” and the opener was a B-side whose name escapes me (maybe “No Place to Hide”?). They closed the set with an amazingly fun version of “Kung Fu,” and the encore was a raucous “Burn Baby Burn.” They also did two new songs that, as expected, kicked ass. “Evil Eye” is going to make a great A-side.

There is just something about Ash that is so true. The local paper wrote in their preview of the show that Free All Angels had five honest singles on it, and that’s pretty accurate. Just about every song they make would be at home on the radio. It seems a crime given all the crappy punk rip-offs making waves in America right now that these guys aren’t selling billions of discs.

I even bought a T-shirt, if for no other reason than my old school “Three Boy Hardcore Action” shirt from 1996 has contracted cancer and needs to go to T-shirt heaven.

Current Soundtrack: Ash, Intergalactic Sonic 7”s

cut_my_hair@hotmail.com

YOU, WHO DO YOU HATE?

This is such a pet peeve of mine. I get one of these e-mails every couple of weeks:
what's an unsolicited submission, and how do I give you a solicited one?

Seriously, this is like, the most basic of information. If you're thinking of entering any creative field, if you can't tell the difference between a submission that has been asked for and one that hasn't, then you shouldn't try. At least spend some time with a dictionary and see if you can't figure it out on your own, so that if you ask how to get solicited, you know what you are asking for. Then again, if you have to ask how you can get solicted, then the answer is likely that you won't be. I can't be any less blunt then that. The thing is, too, the person who sent this e-mail got the e-mail address off the contact page of the Oni website, which has the Oni FAQ, which tells people how Oni looks at work.

I am not sure why I chose to put that in here, but given all the articles I've been involved in lately talking about the submissions process, it seemed to make sense.

Current Soundtrack: people talking outside my window

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SMOKESTACK LIGHTNING

Don’t worry. Today I am a mixture of unawake and chipper. It’s a get-up-and-go Saturday. It’s 8:30 a.m. and I just booted up and I am a third into my bagel and just a couple sips into my iced mocha.

Joy Division, The Complete BBC Recordings

When I got here, there was someone I worked with over five years ago at Dark Horse getting ready to leave. I spotted him, but he didn’t spot me. He’s a nice guy, but really, I have no interest to play catch-up. So we have to switch on. The game is appearing less aware than you are. Always know where your avoidance target is, but always manage to be looking the other way. Turn and go off in a different direction when he nears you. Hide in plain sight, but always be prepared for it to go south. Have plausible deniability at the tip of your tongue. “Oh, I didn’t see you.”

I’ve been known to shop, go through whole stores, always staying just out of sight of someone I know. How invisible can one become? Usually, it’s pretty easy to do, just because in general people aren’t very alert to their surroundings. We’re too comfortable in our public lives, and you can easily take advantage of a situation just by paying attention to what is around you. Then again, who is to say they aren’t running the same game on me?

*

Before I left the house, I managed to catch the new Sugar Ray video for the second time. What is up with that? I mean, beyond Mark McGrath’s hideous hair crime (bleached and shaggy? Whaaaaa? Buy a comb, millionaire!). Are they trying to be Pink now? Are they coming up to get my party started? They’ve always had armpit stains of desperation forming on their career, witnessed by how quickly they settled into pattern, going from lame rock band to lame soft rock band to churn out a couple of extra hits that closely resembled their first hit—but this, this is just sad. Next single will be about how McGrath is his own worst enemy.

Massive Attack vs. Mad Professor, No Protection

I’m trying to listen to as much electronic music as possible when working on Gravitation. Shuichi’s band, Bad Luck, is kind of an OMD-type band—electronic with guitars. A little Gary Numan, perhaps. There is also a bit of overly emotional poetry in the smattering of lyrics we’ve gotten for his character—so good, moody stuff like Joy Division also helps out. Gets me in the right place to do whatever it is that I do. (And actually, OMD’s Organisation is next in the stack (I had to bring CDs with me, since no MP3 player). It’s cold and pretentious, arty and distant—perfect for Gravitation’s confused romance. And the Dandy Warhols new, electro-driven album, Welcome to the Monkeyhouse cued up right in time for a performance section.)

And speaking of the MP3 player, perhaps the greatest tragedy is not being able to get into the drive and remove the files. Not that I am losing anything I don’t have on disc (as far as I know), but more for some of the folders I had built. Collections of Geneva, Suede, and Paul Weller, in particular, where I gathered all the b-sides and compilation tracks I had, creating folders with 40 or more songs—not impossible to rebuild, but still frustrating.

Current Soundtrack: cable radio, new wave station (currently Oingo Boingo's "Weird Science")

cut_my_hair@hotmail.com

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WHEN I'M DRUNK I DANCE LIKE YOUR DAD

Havent been doing a lot of serious writing lately, but just for the hell of it, wrote a couple of reviews on Amazon.

*

Tinka by Rainy Dohaney (aka Renee French)

[five stars] Sweet as can be, and gorgeous to look at..., May 18, 2003

Reviewer: Jamie S. Rich from Portland, OR USA

This is that rare and special kind of children's book that doesn't play to any particular age or audience, instead choosing to exist in a world where every breathing soul can enjoy its simple message and its fun delivery.

Dohaney's theme isn't new. Her young lamb Tinka follows her dreams, finding the courage to accept her own individuality and seeing life beyond the confines of the tiny farm where her family lives. What's special is that the discovery of this courage does not come at the expense of that family unit--in fact, it enhances Tinka's place amongst the herd (and not in some scary conformist way, either, but in a warm and fuzzy good way).

Adding further to the specialness of the book is Dohaney's unique vision. Tinka's world is not a conventional one. It's filled with oddball characters and a vivid imagination that allows a field of flowers to be seen as a giant spider by those unwilling to look beyond their fenced-in pens. The illustrations have a loving depth of detail, with small touches like ever-present insects used to add an extra dimension to Tinka's farm, bringing it all to life. Dohaney's soft colors are gorgeous, too, and you'll want to spend a good amount of time looking at them even after you're done reading the words.

All in all, a special debut. I plan to buy a couple of copies and give them to friends who have some children on the way, so that they can share the delight I've found in TINKA.

*

The Libertines, Up The Bracket

[one star] Don't believe the hype. Really., May 12, 2003

Reviewer: Jamie S. Rich (see more about me) from Portland, OR USA

If you run across this in a store, you'll see some pretty astounding declarations of praise for this record on the packaging sticker, and those declarations are all complete and utter ....

This disc is a collection of some of the most tuneless, half-baked songs I have heard in a long while. It's one thing to put on a leather jacket and strike the poses of drugged out rock 'n' roll party boys, but you should probably make sure you have the rock 'n' roll first.

The first couple of songs, "Vertigo" and "Death on the Stairs," start the album out okay. You can hear Mick Jones' production influence, as they sound a bit like ramshackle Clash demos. But then it all goes awry. There are no melodies, no wholly formed songs, just a big drunken mess. The bonus track of UK single "What A Waster" redeems it a little near the end there...but I'm not sure you'll even want to be listening by then--even at the album's extremely short running length.

So, pass on this. If you need modern rock with a little old-time jangle, try The Strokes or something. Yeah, they're big fakers, but at least they give it a bit more effort.

The Libertines page is interesting, because it's almost like a war is going on. It seems every review is getting "unhelpful" user ratings, and you have to wonder if the fans are beating up the non-fans. If I'd bothered to read other people's reviews before I posted, though, I'd have avoided the hype headline and the reference to The Strokes.

Current Soundtrack: Robbie Williams, The Ego Has Landed

cut_my_hair@hotmail.com

THE LORD IS MY SHOTGUN

J. Torres gets me to talk some more about submissions, which most of your should be sick of by now.

Current Soundtrack: Primal Scream, Evil Heat

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KNOCK DOWN THE OLD GRAY WALL

So, interesting things are happening.

A writer friend of mine has approached me about developing a series of genre-related YA novels to pitch to a big deal publisher. We’re in the midst of working on that right now, and I don’t really want to say much more, but it could be quite an opportunity. Being paid to write is always a bit of a holy grail-type thing, and if we’re building from the ground up, even if it’s not the sort of thing I would do on my own normally, there will be ways to make it interesting and fun. Plus, it doesn’t end my work on The Everlasting, and will even allow me to kickstart my relationship with an agent I’ve known for a bit of time—meaning even if it doesn’t roll (and who ever knows with such things), there could be fringe benefits.

Current Soundtrack: Badfinger, The Very Best of Badfinger

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YOUR LOVE IT LIES

Will it ever happen?

Current Soundtrack: Placebo, "Bitter End" CD2

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THERE'S SOMETHING IN THE AIR

Just to follow up from old journal entries, Pete Townshend has been cleared of all child pornography charges. Read the story.

Current Soundtrack: Thunderclap Newman, Hollywood Dream (produced by Pete)

YOU'VE GOT YOUR HEAD SCREWED ON

I got my haircut today, so I am in an understandably good mood. I already want to go back and get it cut again. Before it was my turn, Jennifer actually had a guy come in for a shave. I had no idea they did that there. I almost wish I had the patience to grow a beard, because I'd do it for next time just so I could see what getting a shave is like.

*

I put up a new Big Talk column at the Oni site. It focuses on how to prepare your comics material for showing an editor at a convention, or sending in a submission.

Current Soundtrack: Travis, "The Beautiful Occupation"

cut_my_hair@hotmail.com

JOURNALISTS WHO LIE

It sucks trying to get mainstream press for comics.

I opened Portland’s main weekly paper today, the Willamette Week, and they had a blurb on Free Comic Book Day that was, well, just read it: “Jiminy-Jillickers, Radioactive-Man! Free stuff for the Stan Lee army? Better strap on your colored spandex and rev up the Batmobile to beat the bad guys to this super-duper giveaway! Participating comic retailers nationwide to disgorge 2 million select titles ranging from Archie to X-Men. Get adamant to adamantium!”

Not only are these sorts of reviews continually frustrating and insulting to fans and professionals who enjoy and create serious comic books, but they aren’t even clever. Every paper has done them, scads of journalists have resorted to them. You might as well go pick up an Oasis record and write about how they sound like the Beatles, or review a Jennifer Lopez movie and say, “You know what? She has a big butt.” It’s the easy way out. And this is in Portland, Oregon. We have four publishers in this town: Oni Press, Top Shelf Productions, Dark Horse Comics, and Adhesive Comics. We also have a ton of creators living here. It’s a comic book town—but I guess since we aren’t making a noise in our garage we’re not cool enough to get a proper amount of respect. (Steve Duin at The Oregonian and Dave Walker at the aforementioned Willamette Week being exceptions.) I mean, not even a mention of the contributions from our local companies? (Oh, and I would say at least the Radioactive Man reference is within this decade, but then, did no one fact check to see that hyphen wasn’t supposed to be there?) (And by titles do they mean individual copies of comics? The way they phrase it makes it sound like we have a huge selection!)

I actually used to try to turn the tide myself. My primary vocation is being a writer; comics editing is a secondary function. I used to write regularly for the Willamette Week, and I actually got them to agree to fairly regular graphic novel reviews in their literature section. After four or five of them, the books editor said to me, “You know, reviews of comics are kind of dumb. They aren’t very interesting. Maybe you could do stuff where people draw the reviews, so that it might be something people would want to read.”

By this logic, reviews of music should be done in song form, and movie reviews done as video clips? And how should I take that insult? Am I that bad of a writer, or are comics such a terrible art form and I’m putting my time into a known loser? Or am I just working for an unknown one? The fuck-off e-mail that followed is something I wish I had to share with you.

Current Soundtrack: Madonna, American Life

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HIGH COOL

Finished the first volume of Duklyon this morning. The last chapter was one big long one where the Defenders face off against Man of Many Faces in an epic CLAMP School crossover that actually amusingly makes fun of how no one can see through everyone’s obvious disguises. It was the best bit of the book, so it made it pretty easy to get up this morning and slam through it, leaving me free for the rest of the weekend to do as I may. The script is due next Friday, so all I need to do is give it a read and a tweak sometime this week.

I am actually relatively excited since my friend who has been in Beijing is coming home, hopefully at the end of this coming week (which could get in the way of me doing anything for Free Comic Book Day). It’s a bit bittersweet, since she has to cut her school term short, since she is coming home due to SARS and the changes it is inflicting on that city. But still, it’s nice news. Plus, she may be the number one person when it comes to kicking my ass over The Everlasting.

Current Soundtrack: From Jamaica, With Love, a March 2003 disc of classic reggae/ska compiled by Chynna Clugston-Major (jealous?)

cut_my_hair@hotmail.com

YOU’VE GOT LOVE TECHNIQUE

Today in the glamourous world of comics, I bought a plate for me to have in the office. No more eating lunch with a paper towel and the all too frequent leap of piping hot whatever onto my pants. I now have a plate. Only took me four years to figure out it might be useful

Current Soundtrack: New Order, "Pop" disc from the Retro box set

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ALL GOOD BOOKS

Another assignment from Kelly Sue for her forum. This time I am meant to be a literary reporter for a tabloid and have to file my latest column.

ON THE BOOK BEAT

Act Like A Writer

What the hell is wrong with the literary community these days? Have we forgotten the mid-‘90s heyday of the finest of our acting community putting fingers to keyboard and jazzing up the world of letters with their finely honed Stainslavsky method writing? From the highest of literary highs in Ethan Hawke’s book, to the Chekhov-like strains of Steve Martin and the populist potboilers of Joan Collins and Carrie Fisher, those of us with discerning eyes were quickly told, “Hey, these kids don’t need words put in their mouths, they have it going on all on their own!”

But now we’re stuck in a wasteland where it seems our only access to the deeper understanding of the human condition celebrities are privy to are tell-alls and reality TV. And that’s just not good enough! I need to know that Catherine Zeta-Jones thinks metaphorically!

So, I say, get off your duffs Hollywood, and show these wannabe Hemingways that their puny prose is really just hemming-and-hawing! Why are you letting such lightweight literati as Michael Chabon and Zadie Smith steal the spotlight when we all know you got it going on?!

Russell Crowe, surely there is a manly manuscript beating in that rippled chest of yours. You’ve got a pirate movie coming this summer, so why not give us a thrilling adventure of male bonding and unnatural love on the high seas?

Johnny Depp, you like to talk about Kerouac, but he was on the road before there were highways. Surely you can give us some true insight into those Los Angeles traffic jams.

Nichole Kidman, you shouldn’t just be playing Virginia Woolf on the screen, but you should put that nose on and sit down at an iMac! I want to know what song your soul sings when it’s not kicking it up at Moulin Rouge!

Freddie Prinze Jr., why are you wasting your time on comic books? Those are so over! Hello, 1963! No, no, no, Freddie—I want to see your name staring back at me in the airport bookshop next time I’m catching a flight to Rio.

The gauntlet has been cast, Tinsel Town! Awards season is over, so you don’t need to be drafting your acceptance speeches any longer. Draft the great American novel instead! Even if you are Australian!

-- Jamie S. Rich

Current Soundtrack: The Coral, The Coral

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BAD MONKEY

Fanboy Radio conducted an interview with me. If you have a fetish for annoying people with annoying voices, then you’ll love me on MP3. Check it out here.

*

I started Duklyon: CLAMP School Defenders last night. This one looks like it might be a bit easy, but also a tad unexciting from a rewrite standpoint. Another in the CLAMP School series, it even guest stars the characters from CLAMP School Detectives and Man of Many Faces. But it is probably the most straight forward of the books. It’s a superhero book. It’s Power Rangers. I’ve only done the first chapter, but that seems to be the gyst—guys put on metal suits to fight baddies who attack CLAMP School.

Current Soundtrack: Love & Rockets, Swing EP (from the Love & Rockets reissue)

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TO SPEAK IS A SIN

Shhhhh!

This is very unlike me. I am not a sharing kind of guy. I like to work in private for the most part. But what the hell…I think I just need to show my work a little, like a math test, prove something exists—however rough it may be.

A few things. Yes, my cat is a character. You’d be surprised how easy it is to fill a gap by looking over your shoulder and seeing what a furball is doing.

In the middle of the section, there is a quick reference to him speaking with someone named Lori. Don’t be confused. He is actually relating the date to someone, and we have been weaving in and out of their conversation. (These pages are in the 30s in the manuscript.)

And yes, the style shifts in the middle, too. The style shifts more than you’ve seen yet. There are three distinctive narrative voices, all centered around Lance, as well as a couple of extra techniques. The conversation technique is a direct lift from This Side of Paradise.

Finally, please don’t spread it. Don’t like to it. Don’t tell your friends. Just let is sit here. My e-mail is below if you really wanna say something. (Yes, I am deluded with grandeur.)

Current Soundtrack: Aaliyah, I Care 4 You

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I'VE GOT SOMETHING I CAN'T EXPLAIN

My blog got its first piece of random mail from someone I had no prior knowledge of. It was titled "confessions of a real pop fan." It made me laugh, I'll say.

Hi mate,

I was just going to write something in my blog when the name of yours caught my eye. I don't usually click on the links on the side, but I have at various times considered calling my blog Confessions Of A Pop Fan, so obviously I was intrigued.

I've allways been going to call mine that because that's basically what mine is. Me and my mate Michael just write collective amounts of crap on being a Pop fan, being part of the much maligned minority group that we are.

I quickly saw references to Sailor Moon and David Bowie on your site, both personal heroes of mine. However, I see that you have a strong love for The Indie, a genre that we love to diss' (we are also Marky Mark fans), which would make me wonder what sort of pop fan you are matey! An ironic one? haha, I couldn't quite figure it out.

Anyway mate, stay cool then!

Crystal

Though I assurred Crystal that there was no irony intended, and that I really did love pop music, a quick look at her blog reveals she has me beat. It's actually a pretty fun site once you decide to just roll with its bonza nature. Still can't have the title, though. ;)

Current Soundtrack: Love & Rockets, Express remastered edition

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TO CUT A LONG STORY SHORT, I LOST MY MIND

I started an editorial for my Big Talk column at onipress.com that I ended up ditching. It was a reactionary piece, responding to a third-hand comment lamenting that Oni is no longer the same publisher that published Oni Double Feature five years ago. It pretty much kicked the shit out of the myths about that book and the nature of an anthology in general, as well as the notion that we should be the same publisher as we were back then—but I’ve backed off. Sometimes you just got to be quiet and let the critics have their day and just not worry about it. The defense ended up belittling what was essentially a very good book with very good work by very good people. But if you’re reading this and thinking, “Gosh, I liked that comic,” then you need to realize it’s been gone since 1999 and if it left that big of a hole in your life, you maybe need one in your skull.

Shit, bitterness rising.

I am working out in public again. I want to get the last quarter of Gravitation volume 2 out of the way. I turned in the first half already, and have been whittling away at the next half, and if I can get it done, I can turn it in tomorrow, three days ahead of the new deadline, which is four days ahead of my original deadline. I am using different headphones tonight and playing Spiritualized’s second disc of Complete Works, and I have it loud, and “Medication” is damn noisy—yet my fears that anyone might ask me to turn it down due to any sonic bleed-through are quelled by the fact that this woman the next table over is actually talking loud enough for me to hear her. There are words for her that shouldn’t be typed in polite blogs. (Maybe I should start an impolite one.)

Have you ever noticed how my entries are much more spiteful when I am out among the masses?

*

I e-mailed Matt Fraction the other day and told him he could have made me a star. Had I taken him up on his offer to do a column for Savant, I’d be announcing a project with Epic right now! Ha!

*

Gravitation is an odd book. In every same-sex relationship, the boys are all insisting they aren’t gay. “I’m not gay, but let’s fuck.” This is how I imagine it secretly is in frat houses across the country. (I said “imagine,” not “fantasize” – it’s a distinct difference.) “So, Pledge McNutty, I’m not gay or anything, but you wanna cornhole?” Do frat boys put on frilly nighties and have pillow fights?

Plus, one of the boys is a sixteen-year-old monk. Must be some religion, the way he apparently puts notches on the headboard.

I did get to write some goofy lyrics in this section. I ripped the opening line off from Joy Division and then went from there. It was a good start. The original lyrics appeared in English in the untranslated book, and I used their mistakes to my advantage. They had “borden” for “burden,” for instance, and in the funky font it looked like “border,” so I ended up using it that way, making the poetry all the more pretentious.

*

Today, two people asked me how the novel was going. I joked that calling a book The Everlasting was a bad idea, since it ended up describing how long it was taking to write it more than the book itself. My next novel is going to be called No Time At All.

Current Soundtrack: Spandau Ballet, Reformation, disc 3 (12” mixes); cool J-pop mix from Elin

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MORE HYPE: A six page preview of Scooter Girl.